So it seems that my preciousssssss and her friends have been dealing with quite a bit of drama lately (okay, maybe "lately" was a bad choice of words), and I have always wondered how in the fucking world she and her particular group of friends manage to contract so much drama in a short space of a few hours.
Then it hit me like a frying pan in the head.
(gongggggggggg)
Skuld's Theory of Internet Drama ~ aka. Skuld's Law
The amount of drama that will involve you and your friends is exponentially proportional to the amount of females that are in your group of friends.
Observe the empirical data:
Roni's group of friends: more than 90% females
Skuld's group of friends: about 50/50
Roni's group of friends: Bring your umbrella to work today, because it will be raining DRAMA DRAMA DRAMA for the next of eternity.
Skuld's group of friends: Fair skies with small chance of drama preciptation, but the night shall be clear and the stars visible for you astronomy freaks.
And the scary part of it is, I bet if Ed, Big Hentai Mike, and I put our heads together, we could actually come up with a mathematical formula based on the variables of average years spent online and average involvement in fandom.
Note that small changes can be made for regular friendship drama, and not just Intarweb drama.
Yay, I have my own Law now. :D With Chang's Law and Skuld's Law, we can explain every single stupid thing we find on the intarweb. (Actually, just Chang's Law will do, but Skuld's Law makes some of the stupidity more predictable, as it contains real math. *gasp* Math doesn't lie, my friends!)
Special note: There are, however, a few cases exempt to Skuld's Law of Internet Drama, and that is the special case of DDR Tournaments, with respect to a certain individual named Rob (who is actually, as far as hearsay goes, not so bad once he's out of range of the machine).
Now I wait for the irony: someone to be offended.
I amuse myself waaaay too much. Have I said that before? Yes, I think have. ^_^
I told you - put more than two women in a room together and you have "instawank." If you can manage to make my personal observation into an actual mathmatical equation I shall be forever grateful.
Mom
(whom was given said theory by her RL mom back when she was about 12 and said mother told her that 1) two women could never live in a house together without drama and 2) once girls reached 12 they turned into the snarky bitches they were meant to be with their first use of a tampon or kotex pad.)
...so what happens with two lesbians? O_O
My theory of why women are so nasty to each other is that there is sense of social competition that society has driven in the heads of most girls.
Everything and everyone is basically telling girls, "You're not good-looking/sexy/skinny enough yet," and once girls see another woman whom they deem is more good-looking/sexy/skinny than them, they go into Bitch Overdrive. I believe another driving force for such competition is finding a mate. >_> I'm sure you and I both know exactly how nasty two girls can be when they're trying to catch the eye of the same man.
I am not yet entirely sure about how it works out with lesbians (as all the ones I've had contact with are appropriately bitchinessless most of hte time). Any thoughts?
(And that's also why lesbians can get along: no competition. They have what they want.)
In my experience, lesbians only get along in pairs if they are dating. And, even then, they have moments of snark.
My husband and I often have the conversation where I have to explain that I don't wear makeup, wear nice clothes, or any of that for HIM. I never did it for any guy. I did it because of the women. Even when out "trolling" to pick up a guy at a bar I didn't dress up for the guy - I dressed up to look better than the other WOMEN whom I would be in "competition" with. I make sure husband doesn't leave the house wearing mismatched socks and other such because of other WOMEN - if he looked rumpled or messed up it would indicate to other women 1) that he's not being taken care of properly and, therefore, he is open season and 2) I would get the "what kind of woman are you that you can't control your man" kind of stares.
We women are VERY territorial. For all the stuff we say about alpha-males and pissing contests, we women are four times as snarky and backstabbing. Why? Guys are told it's ok to get in there and mix it up but women are trained that we have to be "ladylike" about our posturing. Result? We can't help but snark and cause wankage when any other woman is near - no matter how much we like them.
^_^
There's a Chinese saying... 3 women = a Market, or something like that. You get the point.
Women in general a real competitive and territorial. On top of that, they crave attention more than most men (on a general term), and therefore, we create more drama than men. *shrug* (However, the guys in my department had more drama than the girls... So I don't know...) In all honesty though, I rather have these women have their own little drama within themselves than men trying to prove they're better and stronger by sending troops oversea...
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Yeah, I just saw Fahrenhit 911... >>;;
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